June 1, 1997

JUNE

Tips on Food and Eating

by Princess Gidget

1. Letting your human know you are hungry is easy: MEOW like there is no tomorrow! Since I am part Siamese, this is very easy for me. Anytime your human gets up to do ANYTHING at all, run to your food dish and meow very LOUDLY and often in repeat sessions. This will call their attention from whatever they wanted to do to the more important fact that your food dish is not as full as it should be. Even if you have food, it isn't enough if you can convince them to give you more!

2. No matter what, if you hear your human open up anything in the kitchen, it must be for you, for who else needs to eat? Run to the edge of the kitchen and yowl, looking up with your eyes glittering like precious gems at them to make you look cute (and if you have two different colored eyes like me, its a bit easier to glitter at them) Phrases like "This isn't for you" and "This is mine" and "Get out of the kitchen, purrbutt" may rise from your human's mouth, but ignore these. What they are trying to say in cat-language is "Would you like a piece, you wonderful goddess-cat?" If you are successful in this, you may get a small piece of something yummy.

3. My human likes (drool) imitation crab meat a LOT, so when she eats it I look at her, and for once don't meow! She will notice that you aren't dancing around like crazy and suddenly look guilty as if she did something to offend you and give you a piece! It works every time for me! Yummy!

4. If your human thinks you are getting a little pudgy because you are asking for your food dish to have food in it 24 hours a day or you meow the roof off, she may try to cut down on your food by taking away your auto-feeder or by not giving you as much food! Don't put up with this! If your food dish is not filled to the brim every second of the day, something is very wrong here! Meow until it is fixed!

Well, those are just a few of my tips for getting fed. Good luck in using them to your advantage and make sure you let your human know who is the BOSS in your house!
Gidget

Favorite Foods

By Maya

There are so many foods I like - I can't even name them all! I think lemon bread is the best!! I'm really really scared of humans, but if Wendy makes Lemon bread I will go in a room with strangers for a piece of it.. the best is the sugary lemon on the top - but I like the cake too.

Bananas too!! I stole a piece off an English muffin.. I don't like English muffins except with lotta butter. That banana was so yummy... and slippery too.

Tuna too!! Humans don't like to give you tuna... but I found the best way... just so something your human thinks is funny. I chirp like a bird.. makes Wendy laugh so much - she always makes me chirp before I finally get a piece.. but it takes practice to chirp like a bird. I learned how from sitting in the front window watching those birds at the feeder.. I can't explain how - you just got to do lots of bird watching. Its hard work for sure... so watch the birds, then have a nap.

Stealing isn't something I'd recommend, but I called it "borrowing" when I got that banana.. so yummy... gee, talking about food is making me hungry.. so think I'll go and see if John's getting tuna for lunch - and do a few chirps to get a piece.

Purrs, Maya

Some Thoughts on Food

By Willy Emo

My daddy had this "brilliant" idea for my column. He suggested I do a piece on the" Pros and Cons" of Food. Hehe....gimme a break, dad ! Ah well , so I came up with a small list . Gotta humor the old boy sometimes :) HUMANS !!!

Pros

1. Tastes good
2. Gives us something to do when our humans are at work.
3. Gives us something to complain about when the bowl is empty.
4. Gives us a reason to lick our paws when finished
5. Keeps the catfood people in business

Cons

1. Have to listen to the humans make those stupid little baby sounds when they fill up our bowls
2. Have to get up out of our favorite "spot" to go get it - lazy humans won't usually bring it to YOU
3. Have to look at those stupid shapes they make the dry food in - like I'm really gonna think they're little fish or something!
4. Have to listen to human dad complain about my eating habits - heck, I've seen him knock food out of his plate too on occasion
5. Gives me gas!

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